The Simplist Type of Equations: You Don’t Listen To Me, Then You Know Nothing About Me

This isn’t a descriptive profile of someone I know and hence would like to write about, but basically an overview of certain type of friend list I have that I would really love to toss in the trash.

I was there in this Cafe with a friend of mine whom I hate to presume as a close kind of friend. We blabbed about so many different things from tiny issues to big ones and which mostly had nothing in personal connection to me.

But whenever it happened that I talked about something that related to me in person, it became for her as a piece of trash that she would really love to disregard. But here lies the question, why the hell do I consider you close? On what basis?

The answer is that there is only base upon which you can define or draw the line between a close type of friend and a non-close or normal type of friend and that is the amount of attention provided. Let me tell you this, only that who gives you attention and actually listens to you is the only one you can possibly consider as “close”.

If you do love someone, you would definitely love to give them attention. You would desperatly love to show them that you actually care about them and you’re keen on listening to them and to their stories no matter how silly they might sound.

Attention is everything and nothing else can work as a substitute for it and not even the grandeur gifts you can give or the enchanting words you can say. Serenade me till forever, but if you don’t actually listen, then you don’t know me and I won’t even want to know you as well.

I had friends (I still do) who can call me up at night to ask me how I’m doing, especially if they read something edgy or dull that I posted about myself on my Facebook wall. They call me up and they ask me “Hey Koki, how are you and what’s wrong” but then, as soon as I tell them what’s actually wrong, they just throw me with one answer “ma’lesh”; a pathetic answer that in its meaning or translation would be equivalent to “to bad to hear this, don’t be sad honey”.

And for Christ’s sakes, did this answer solve anything??? This is a rhetorical question to which there is no answer that can fit but “no”. Worse, they start drifting the conversation toward their own problems. I don’t mean to be selfish or anyting like that, but why did you bother to call me in the first place?

I’m so sick and tired of those who act as close to me when they are the most distant! It is as simple as that, you won’t ever know me as “Christine” unless you talk to me and actually listen.

Don’t preach me and don’t make the conversation sound as if you’re expressing your condolences to me. This isn’t a some kind of a funeral.

I won’t say more in regards to this pathetic topic, because I have obviously said enough. I hope I truly get the honor to meet someone who can listen to me and just basically be there when I need them the most.

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